Letting You Know I’m Okay… Makeup Therapy

guys it's me nikki some of you have followed me for years and if you've been following me for years you know that 2020 has been a ride look in these years i got to do some of the most amazing things but also shared my darkest days with you and i can tell you today is one of those dark days a couple of days ago dylan and i were part of one of my worst nightmares um we were robbed at gunpoint at our own home and even though i can't tell you too much because there's still a very ongoing um i do want to let you know that i'm okay i may not look like i'm okay right now but i'm okay having one of those worst nightmares come true is very surreal but it also puts a lot of things in perspective now more than ever you realize that family is everything and being in good health is even more important so maybe one day i'll be able to tell you everything but right now it's impossible for my mental state but also for the law because we're trying to do everything to make this right one of the silver linings in my life now here we go this is going to sound so cliche has always been makeup and that's one thing i won't let them take away from me is my love for makeup um so i bought a barbie makeup has helped me through my darkest days losing my little brother um more stuff happening in my personal life makeup has always been that one thing that i could do to clear my mind focus on some other stuff it is literally therapy to me every time i had one of those dark days i had you there to support me and you have been there for me so much i can't thank you enough for the messages i've seen on twitter on instagram everywhere and knowing that there's such a huge group of people out there who are rooting for us who are loving us who are wishing us nothing but the best thank you honestly thank you enough tears we'll save that for later i really want to get my mind off of things and tsay barbies have no feelings and i am in the mood for no feelings so let's go all right so for today's video i've been seeing these color reveal barbies everywhere i think the first time i saw it was on tick tock and this girl was like collecting these and she needed one more and then she had a complete collection and it gave me an idea now if someone has done this idea clearly i've not been in the loop the last couple of days so if anyone has done this please comment down below so we can give a proper shout out so there's this girl this girl this girl this girl and this girl and what this is it's a coker container right here there's a container and in here is a barbie doll and she is covered in pink paint and she also has secret clothes secret hair she has it all so what we're gonna have to do is take her accessories out wow as a child barbie's made me feel better but you don't even want to know how much it makes me feel right now there's a lot of stuff in here i think i have so much built up aggression in my body that i would open this in seconds but no what we're going to do is we're going to pop her into this container we're gonna fill this up with warm water and then we're gonna shaky shake and then the grand reveal is here and whatever comes out if i like it enough okay because i have options if i like her enough if i like her look enough because i see some bright colors and i'm in the mood for bright colors i'm gonna do a look inspired by my new best friend do you ever stress about what your true identity is me too girl i said it before i'll say it again um if you're like this girl sick in her mind she's joking around joking and making jokes is my coping mechanism okay i need to joke around to get over this so bear with me okay toys were not this fun when i was around god okay here we go we'll have a name for her soon let's find out who comes out oh my god oh my god oh my god she's already melting i don't want to see it yet oh my god this is a pinkity drinkity okay here we go okay oh a beaut oh my god is that an alpaca look at the beauty included in the in the barbie doll house is this little pouch right here with a little sponge and now tsay that if you wet the sponge with cold water you can add highlights so let's do it oh my god i feel like i'm seven years old again hi welcome to the salon man oh my oh my god do you think there's makeup underneath no twouldn't oh my god lipstick is coming lipstick is coming what is this sorcery oh my god this is the best therapy a person can ask for all right so before we get to the colors of our new best friend it is time for that perfect flawless barbie doll base the first product i'm gonna go in with is of course primer because not to prime oh god wrong timing is a crime now because these dark circles are living their own life on my face it's time to get rid of them i am going to color correct using the dragon beauty dragonfire skin perfecting potion damn you know you've had a rough week when your dark circles pierce through the orange for foundation i'm gonna take the most full coverage one i own and that is the juvia's place i am magic matte foundation and i'm using the color 720 bali let's balance away the feelings time for some necessary concealer oh i've never been so happy to wear concealer in my life and now i'm setting my face using the juvia's place i am magic setting powder in white sands okay now let's find out what type of hair we have in store for our new best friend wig stop it this is me oh god oh my god how do you put this on oh oh a beauty queen we're gonna brush you out a little bit mm-hmm that hair color oh brad mondo is shook all right so for the eye look let's do let's take some inspiration from her beautiful tiffany blue bathing suit so this right here is the lovely wig that our barbie doll got so what i want to do is take this color this sort of tiffany blue teal color as the main inspo and then add flavors of pink and lilac and lavender that's the same and just one cotton candy unicorn realness first let's prime the first color i'm going in with is by this obsessed palette by pinky rose cosmetics and i'm taking this shade right here called sisters i really want to look like a human barbie doll hybrid at the end of this so we're gonna have some fun it feels good to be here it feels good to sit here play with makeup and truly have my escape i know this is going to sound so silly to most of you but makeup has always been this escape for me it has been this way of clearing my thoughts of getting everything in place in my mind and it is what i so desperately need in this time at this moment but i'm not gonna lie it is so hard it is going to take a lot of time for dylan and myself and our family and friends to to grow from this and to keep going with life even though life does not hold back my best friend linda recently got the call that she has breast cancer and it's like when is it enough you know when when is life gonna be like okay you're good people here's some good things every time you're like okay we're o